naked. odwalla. bolthouse.

you know what? i really like brand loyalty. i really, really do. i like having that special, specific thing that’s mine. my favorite. there’s just something about having a favorite that gives you the right to act really addictive about it. (ahem, my pete wentz crush). so i like trying to find favorites, but sometimes people make it really hard on me. here’s my dilemma.

vs. vs.

i’m totally digging the fruit juices and smoothies by naked, odwalla, and bolthouse farms. i started with odwalla, because i had staked my claim on the odwalla superfood bars. they were my favorite of all the odwalla bars in existence. so now that i had that established, it was obvious that i had to try the odwalla superfood juice. i loved it. but then i saw naked superfood (green machine) juice staring at me from the refridgerated aisles of various new york delis. i loved that too. and look, here’s another one – doesn’t stand out as much in the crowd, but worth trying – bolthouse farms. i went from type to type without a favorite, very uncomfortably, for awhile.

recently i’ve started drinking carrot juice. this is because i was on a juice cleanse and i started to feel really light headed from all the fruit sugars i was drinking, and i needed a change. thanks to odwalla i found a delicious 100% carrot juice. i dont think naked makes a carrot juice, and i liked the odwalla taste better than bolthouse farms. odwalla carrot juice was slowly becoming my favorite.

today, the deli near work didn’t have odwalla carrot juice so i bought bolthouse farms. a girl from my office walked by and told me that her boyfriend works for bolthouse farms. we got to talking and she told me that naked and odwalla are owned by coke and pepsi. DAMMIT!! i don’t want my favorite odwalla to be owned by coke, just like i didn’t want my favorite pete dating ashlee. its too mainstream or something.

so i decided maybe bolthouse would have to be my favorite since they are a privately owned company and not coke/pepsi owned. but then i found an article saying that Mr. Bolthouse donated $100,000 towards the anti-gay rights movement. that is totally and completely uncool in my school, friends.

so, basically i decided there’s only one solution: buy a juicer. i’ll make my own damn favorite. but don’t judge me if you see me drinking any of the above beverages.

the end.